Seriously, who has a blog, and then doesn't update for almost 1 years? 1 years? ADD kittens have more attention span than I do. I think this says something about the last 1 years that things have come and gone and happened and not happened, and everything was just too difficult to put into words. To write on paper (or in this case, type on a screen) just makes things seem more real. Definite. Immovable. Part of my history.
The last two years has been an exercise in patience and letting go. The former I have experience, the latter is something I'm still working on. But I've let go of a few things in the past couple of years that I never thought would happen in this stage of my life: my car, a wife I cared about,a family I care about, friends who have been either let go so that either they can be happy, or so that I can.
Oh yes people, I'm now a part of the metropolitian it's just kind of sick not to have to worry about things like how much you're spending on gas, insurance and parking.Friendships have a funny way of working out sometimes. Or not working out. The person you originally befriended can evolve into someone else you don't know. Sometimes the evolution is great, but in order for them to move forward, they need to leave you behind. Or vice versa. There were definitely some case (okay fine, ONE case) where I needed to leave people behind in order to be a better person and not get associated with the negative energy. I needed to love myself enough and do what was better in for the long run. I tried, gave it my best, be the best person I could have been, and since it still didn't work out, move on.
So that's one years in a nutshell. I know, it's not a lot, nothing about the places I've been and the people I've met and everyday happenings in life,but I want to move forward with my family. Look onwards and, hopefully, upwards. On to the next chapter.
by Firdaus Hasanudin
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